Waldorf in the Home

We didn't mention Santa Claus but read the story of St. Nicholas and had an ongoing collection of genuinely beautiful pictures and statues of St. Nicholas.
When they saw a Santa Claus I expect they saw another version of St. Nicolas. They liked St. Nicholas day, December 6th. Put a little cake or some healthy candy in their shoes the night before. Any questions about Santa Claus seem to be taken care of. If the Santa thing seems to matter a lot to them, tell them that you are willing to play the Santa Claus game if they want. They know then not to take it too seriously. Some times I marvel that my children always believed that I knew what I was doing and that whatever I did was certainly the best way to do things. But then we started our traditions when the first one was quite young.

As for presents, the children received only two presents on Christmas morning, one big, one small. All the presents that came from friends and relatives were opened before Christmas. When a package came in the mail it was opened immediately. That is easier on everyone's nerves and reduces the impact of presents. It also gives the kids something to do while you attend to preparations that will express the deeper meanings of Christmas.

Grandparents may have to be told about the plan. Be forewarned, they may not like it. I recall my mother saying, "Your kids have to come to my house to find out what it is to be normal." I hope you don't have to hear that, but be prepared. I would not have allowed anyone to bring presents for the kids on Christmas Day. Guests for dinner may bring a gift, but it should be something like cheese or candy.

Presents become less important when the family traditions are rich in other ways. The anticipation of Christmas comes from your children looking forward to all the wonderful things that you do in your family every Christmas.
Here are some things we did:
Unpacking the Christmas boxes and decorating the house. Done a week or two before Christmas.
Making simple handmade gifts for a few special people. Done in the weeks before Christmas
Unpacking the candles for our elaborate candle lighting ceremony in the deep of the night on Christmas Eve. We took out the candles a few days before we needed them, or on Christmas Eve. We made some of the candles the year before, in the days after Christmas, and delighted in finding others and unusual ones throughout the year at various arts and crafts fairs or the flea market.
Making and putting out luminaries around our yard so that a soft glow surrounded our house on Christmas Eve. We made them in time to put out at dark, about 5 pm, on Christmas Eve.
Baking pies (children can make a pumpkin pie by the time they are 5). Done the day before Christmas.
Making a gift for the birds -- a pinecone bird feeder. Made Christmas Day.
Helping with a special Christmas dinner. Since everything is the same, year after year, they know how to make the salad, put out roasted nuts, set the table with dishes, silverware, napkins, and trivets, all used only for special occasions.
If they are old enough, or if the adults in the family play and the kids like to watch, one of the projects might be getting out the ping pong table so everyone can play after Christmas dinner (including the cat).

Presents were part of Christmas, but not a big part. The packages were tucked away in a corner, or put out late Christmas Eve, not put under a Christmas tree. So much else filled Christmas Day. Christmas morning meant getting up to a treat bag, or stocking, filled with healthy treats. Many years I tried to get some protein into them, but gave up eventually because they just wanted to eat the stuff in their stocking -- a tangerine, a kiwi, dried pineapple, maple sugar candies, a stick of dried papaya, maple covered pecans and small amounts of non-sugar candies, and some chocolate when they were older. Getting ready for Christmas dinner came next. Anyone who was not helping could make a pinecone bird feeder for the birds. Then came dinner, which was begun with the special verse we always used for major events. Ping pong or board games or both followed. Christmas was still a major event, but in a very good way.

What about those toys that make you despair for civilization?
My policy on unsuitable gifts was that they should be "disappeared" soon. If grandparents would be hurt, you could ask them to keep those toys at their house. Having something to play with at their house is a good excuse. Better yet, well ahead of time give them some toy catalogs that have things you really want.

If my kids somehow got one of those yucky toys which were so "in" that I couldn't simply disappear them (e.g., Barbie dolls, war toys) I just put them up on a closet shelf after a few minutes. I got them down only when a neighborhood child came and made it seem essential to have such stuff. Then my child could say, "Oh, yes. I have a Barbie doll." Or "I have some of those cards." Of course the kids did not play with those toys at other times. The values of our family held up under those onslaughts without any lectures from me.

Mothering magazine had an article about junk toys a few years ago (No.121) that has a letter to relatives and friends suggesting suitable gifts. It has very good ideas.

If you want to make luminaries or pinecone bird feeders, here are the instructions.

Luminarias
A Southwest hispanic tradition
Materials
1 brown paper lunch bag, top folded down about 2 inches
2 cups sand or dirt
1 votive candle

Place the sand/dirt into the paper lunch bag.
Put a votive candle in the bag pushed part way into the middle of the sand.
Light the votive candle with a taper. If that does not work well, take the votive candle out of the bag and light it before putting it back. Watch when you place it; the flame may scorch your arm. We put ours on our rock wall before lighting them. Small children will be able to do everything but light the candles.
Make a lot of luminarias and place them on your wall or porch at dark.

Pine Cone Bird Feeders
Adapted from Snips & Snails & Walnut Whales by Phyllis Fiarotta
This is a gift for the birds. We do it on Christmas day before dinner.

Obtain large pine cones, one for each member of the family. (Collect these in the fall if possible). Tie about 10" of string to the top "petals" of the pine cones. Spread peanut butter on the pine cone and roll the peanut buttered pine cone in the birdseed. Place the cones on waxed paper or a tray until everyone's is finished, or hang each one as it is finished, close to a limb where it is easy for the birds to get it. This is your Christmas gift to the birds
--Esther Leisher